i have a question. does it really make life happier if you don't have any expectations? i think i'll always remember the episodes of the 'O' show about the power of positive thinking. she said, the universe is conspiring to give you what you ask for. but in order to get it, you need to be aware of ur desires, and then let it go... hmmm...

i had a really wild night. the most wild i have ever been i think. and the funnest too. celebrating my dear friend XJ's early birthday over alcohol. that final drink was definitely potent. i was completely floating by the time i entered the blasting music. Toxic. i guess the reason why i find tonight the most fun i've ever had... is because i went in with only the expectation of celebrating my best friend's birthday. i think my subconscious secretly made a decision that tonight, will be a night with friends. period. so looking at the people... catching their eyes, i turn back to my friends, not giving it further thoughts. unlike all the other times.

it was fun while it lasted. and i know that it ends with the music. so that is that. no, i have not done anything i may regret later on. it was just plain ol' fun. nothing more. but i was surprised though. the same person who i noticed, but left it at that - a fleeting glimpse. and now, it shall remain a fleeting memory. only a fragment of a memory. a moment in time... unable to be contaminated by the troubles that come with squeezing more out of nothing. yes terence. be wise. and forget about everything... instead, focus on what you already have.

so although it was for XJ, i feel that i have enjoyed the most for tonight's outing. so thankyou to all my besties who were there for giving me such a wonderful time. more enjoyable is supper at serangoon garden! away from the noise and crowd, we can talk in peace; our hearing not impaired and our voices not strained. laughing, joking, taking pictures and talking with the auntie. and of course, eating that exceptionally delicious prata. my only hope is... that someone will finally accept himself for all that he is. and be at peace with himself... remember that your friends will always be here for you. the non-judging breakfast club. ok?

i wish i could go into more detail. but i think i've described what i want to describe to the best of my ability... but hey... if you're in my inner circle, you'll already know everything! ;) and before i leave to pass out (meaning sleep.. and END OF BMT!), i just want to say that i had a really special night. a night of new experiences. but i will always remind myself, that these things are meant to be perfect illusions. incorporeal. like a mirage. it will do me good to remember that it is nothing worth being taken seriously. absolutely nothing. :)

- transcient memories will quickly wither and fade away.